sprinkles and the nuts who love 'em.

When i first moved to Los Angeles i hated it. i hated everything about this place. I hated the fake people, the plastic boobs, the plastic smiles and the personalities that had the depth of a martini glass. i felt alienated from the culture that focued on appearances and fame and spent every day regretting my decision to move here.

But then, something happened.

I decided to get to know Los Angeles a little more by driving around, and what i saw was that Los Angeles is not any one thing at any one time. This city suffers from a case of multiple personality disorder in that each neighborhood in the sprawling landscape has its own culture, its own dress and people with varying intersts and tastes. I pulled over to have tea in Los Feliz and while i sat and watched the tragic hipsters walk by that's when i realized something.

Los Angeles is a layer cake.

A really fucking crazy layer cake, but a layer cake nonetheless.

Think about it. When you first move here, or visit here, what's the first thing you see? Its the most obvious stereotypes of the city: those Hollywood wannabes, who spend every penny they have buying plastic surgery, leasing B.M.W's while they live in a complete shithole, all just to attain the look of "making it." Unfortunately, because of reality t.v. and all sorts of dumb movies, this is what the rest of the world thinks Los Angeles is like. These narsisstic characters, for better or worse, are the first thing people see when they come here. These over-processed blondes are the sprinkles of our large layer cake that we all call home. They stick out, they look delicious, but when it comes down to it, there's always more to a cake than the sugary, processed sprinkles.

Should you investigate more, should you cut the cake open, you would find that there is indeed more to Los Angeles than just the sprinkles. There's layers of apricot, kiwi, vanilla frosting, chocolate, whatever. There are things you never expected in the cake, and these are things that you love, things that you always hope are in the cake when you cut it in half, and yet you're suprised when someone does put it in. cheesy as it may sound, this is our city. our chameleonlike culture changes from mile to mile and affords every different personality a space to explore.

you want chocolate, tight pants and awkward haircuts? Los Feliz, Silverlake and Atwater Village are at your disposal.

Looking for pineapples, yoga and organic lifestyles? Santa Monica probs has every kind of spiritual-oriented work out you've ever dreamed of.

and though our city has many problems (like cakes that unexplicably have rasins in them), i believe that the diversity of this city overcomes all of the assholes on sunset that we'd all like to see move somewhere else (and take the saddle ranch with them). In any case, if you hate this place, i promise you there's more than meets the eye. Did you know, for instance, that there is an event almost every month that involves a lip-synching contest with tetris battles?

yum. i love layer cakes, and now i love los angeles. sprinkles or no....I just scrape them off.